Daily Mail, 2/27/17:
Dough! Bizarre moment a brawl breaks out on a packed train after a woman puts a BAGEL on a fellow passenger's head
This is the moment a fight broke out on a packed train after a woman put a bagel on another passenger's head.
The incident took place on the 12.54am London to Huntingdon service early on Sunday morning and was caught on camera by Twitter user Dougie Stew.
You can't make this up.